Ripe TV

By making your own custom action figure. For the low, low, totally worth it price of 425 dollars you can have your very own 12-inch version of yourself. Custom tattoos and stud earrings cost extra (just like in real life!). Now if only you can find a chick to appreciate how staggeringly groovy this is.

The best part, though, is when they feel like the have to defend the patently phenomenal idea of having a 12-inch action figure of yourself by describing uses for your doll.

...there is no event that these would not be welcome. Another solution is Memorial Action Figures, Bereavement Gifts, Funeral Gifts,

Funeral gifts, indeed! If there aren’t two versions of ourselves doing battle with gladiator jousting sticks atop our coffins we will be back to haunt the living piss out of every one of our friends and family for at least a year. Make a note in your Blackberries.